Loving ourselves can be hard. Hell, there are days when it might seem impossible.
As soon as I start talking about self-love, I can hear the voice in your head already, starting to list all the things you DON’T love about yourself. It’s like when I was a personal trainer and I would ask my clients what was going well with their nutrition, and they would immediately rhyme off all the crap they’d been eating. Um…that wasn’t the question, my love.
So, here’s where we’re going to start with self-love. It’s a journal prompt that gives us a way in.
What do I love about myself already?
I used this prompt the other day, and here is what I wrote:
I love that my heart is open, despite all the experiences I thought would have hardened it forever. That’s what I love the most. Willingness. Trust. Insisting on presence.
The way it says, “I’m still here.”
Still beating.
I won’t hide in the corner or stop showing up or quit wanting more – more connection, creativity, compassion. It opens over and over again and it just won’t stop.
Gone are the days of self-denial.
I am willing to sense my truth whether it pleases others or not.
Whether people agree with me or not.
Whether they understand or not.
This still takes work. I grew up learning to deny my own experiences because others “knew better.” If something seemed off, well I must simply have misunderstood. Our culture does the same, telling us that we must be misinterpreting events and intentions when people hurt us…especially as women. We are taught to doubt ourselves.
When I stand in the fullness of what I know to be true, I am loving myself fiercely.
It still hurts when people downplay the significance of my experience, or even worse, defend those who have hurt me instead of showing me empathy.
But I suffer when I worry about what they think.
I suffer when I believe I must convince them.
I suffer when I allow their approval of me to outweigh my integrity.
So I feel the discomfort. Because I’ve always wanted to be understood. More than anything, I’ve always wanted to belong. So instead of searching for home outside myself, I come back to my own heart. I am at home in myself. I am at home in all places.
I’d love to hear from you. What do you love about yourself already? Let me know in the comments below.
Together, we rise.
Hi! I'm Brigid Dineen, Soul Whisperer. I believe in a world where well-being comes first. I develop bespoke self-care plans and coach women to set healthy boundaries so they can stop trying to live on leftovers and finally develop their dreams.
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